Gaining Latitude with a Right Heart Attitude…

 Gaining Latitude with a Right Heart Attitude… 

Mary Ann Wray 

 Like everybody, I struggle with bad attitudes from time to time. This happens particularly when I see some form of injustice or people being taken advantage of including myself. Whether it's something I've seen on the news or even happening in the church, my first response is usually anger or sorrow. These emotional responses can be the result of a political blunder or unjust policy, an act of violence, a personal tragedy, crime, greed, abusing the people of God for money, SA and misusing positions of authority in and out of the church. After prayer and contemplating all of this, I believe the Lord has given me some insight through the scriptures into a human problem that may be of help to you too.

First, let’s define what an attitude really is. An attitude is a settled way of thinking or feeling about something, and it usually shows up in how a person acts or responds. In plain terms: it’s your mental posture toward a person, situation, or idea. A bit more specifically, an attitude includes three parts:

1.      Beliefs – what you think about something or someone

2.      Feelings – how you feel about it

3.      Behavior – how those thoughts and feelings influence what you do or don’t do

It’s been said that a positive attitude: approaching challenges with openness and hope brings about positive change but a negative attitude: expecting the worst or resisting change leads to frustration and failure. So, what does the Bible say about “attitudes” if at all? Although the Bible doesn’t use the word attitude, the aforementioned definition of the word gives us a real clue as to what and how the scriptures address the mind and the heart. Scripture talks a lot about the mindset and heart position behind our actions. Paul told the believers in Philippi the following…

 Philippians 2:5 “Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus,” and 1 Corinthians 2: 16

 “For who has understood the mind of the Lord so as to instruct him?” But we have the mind of Christ.”

 We see in these passages that attitude is the mind and heart we choose to carry. In Proverbs Solomon says the following:

 “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” Proverbs 4: 23

 Our inner attitude shapes our outward behavior and demeanor. Therefore, how we think and how we believe about something or someone on any given day is reflected in and by our actions and countenance. Even body language can express our inner most thoughts without saying a word like rolling our eyes, crossing our arms, slamming things, stomping out of a room, gritting our teeth and even “clamming up.” We can allow our attitudes to conform us to a worldly pattern of unbelief or transform our inner man into the image of Christ more and more.

“I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”

Romans 12:1-2

 There’s rest and a peace for the people of God but the enemy to obtaining this rest and peace is unbelief. See Hebrews 4. The good news is that attitudes can be changed. Biblically speaking, attitude is the orientation of the heart and mind toward God, others, and circumstances. There is a difference between a bad attitude versus a mood, good or bad and a mood versus personality traits. Moods are defined as temporary emotional states like “I’m grumpy because I didn’t sleep” or “I didn’t eat anything today so I’m hangry.” However, an attitude is a chosen mindset that guides responses. Even though you may be tired or hungry, you choose to respond with patience not irritation.

 A personality is defined as long-term traits such as being an introvert/extrovert, Type A & B etc. For example, some people are naturally quiet and reserved. There’s a big difference between that personality trait versus allowing a bad mood to cause you to clam up and not communicating in a constructive way. There is a healthy way to express joy, sadness and even anger over a situation but it must be done with the right heart attitude.

 Here are a few common attitudes that shape daily life in a healthy way:

 • Gratitude – noticing blessings instead of lack

• Humility –being teachable no matter how old you are and not getting defensive when questioned or even opposed by others

• Faith – trusting God beyond circumstances

• Perseverance – steady commitment despite hardship \

 Here are a few unhealthy attitudes:

 • Pride – “I already know”.  “Don’t question me.” “Don’t you know who I am?”

 • Entitlement – “I deserve better”

• Bitterness – holding onto offense, anger and resentment

• Cynicism – expecting disappointment

Your attitude is like a lens through which you interpret life. That lens can either darken everything you see or let the light in. There are scriptural and practical ways to reset a bad attitude.

First, name it honestly. Call it for what it is: “I’m irritated,”  “I’m resentful,” “I’m angry,” “I’m offended.” These are just a few. Then after identifying and naming them, immediately look to God’s word for the remedy. God honors humility and works with honesty, not denial.

Psalm 139:23 says “Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts and see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!”

Next, separate your feelings from God’s best for you. Refuse to remain in them and as a result, developing a bad heart attitude. Feelings happen and sometimes emerge when we least expect. At times they feel uncontrollable, especially when faced with danger or threats. For example, fear is an emotion but we don’t have to pitch a tent and camp out there. Attitude of heart is a choice that follows our feelings.  Fear, anger, frustration, confusion and even pride, are emotions that can quickly pass if we handle them Biblically. However, attitudes are choices. We have to learn to choose through an act of our own will how our heart will respond: “Will I respond with grace or let this emotion rule me?” Here are a few Biblical examples on how to deal with emerging emotions…

Anger…Ephesians 4:26 & 27— “Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil.”

Fear…Psalm 34: 4 – “I sought the Lord, and he answered me and delivered me from all my fears.”

Irritation…1 Corinthians 13: 4 & 5 – “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful.”

Pride…James 4: 6-7 – ” But he gives more grace. Therefore, it says, “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.”

Learn to pause your mouth.  Most attitude damage happens through words. Learn to delay your response. Say less, not more. Even a 5 to 10 second pause can save a relationship and grief.

Proverbs 17:27 & 28 — “Whoever restrains his words has knowledge, and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding. Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise;
when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent.”

When thoughts shift, attitudes shift. Before saying anything it really helps to ask yourself some questions… “Is how I feel really based on all the facts or just how I feel about it? Do I understand the person’s heart or am I reacting to what they said or did without considering more?  Is it necessary to say anything at all? If it is necessary, am I responding in a Christ-like way with the fruit of the Spirit?” If the offense and pain is real as yourself, “Who is it that vindicates me-my anger or God?”

“For we know him who said, “Vengeance is mine; I will repay.” And again, “The Lord will judge his people.”” Hebrews 10: 30

“for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God. Therefore put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls.” James 1: 20-21

When the Apostle Paul called out sin, false teachers and prophets, he did so with a heart of grief and sorrow over it all. Galatians tells us when someone is overtaken in a sin we need to consider ourselves unless we get overtaken with the same fault. This is where bad and/ or self-righteous attitudes start. See Galatians 6: 1-4

Also, we can replace common thought responses like “They always…” with “What’s actually happening right now?” and “This is unfair” with “God is still at work.” We can choose obedience over emotion.  You don’t have to wait until you feel right to act right.  Right actions lead the way to right feelings.

2 Corinthians 10:4 & 5 — “For the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh but have divine power to destroy strongholds. We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ.”

Ask God for help quickly and briefly It doesn’t have to be fancy.  “Lord, reset my heart.” The Holy Spirit is our helper. He leads and guides us into all truth. He comforts us when we are overwhelmed or grieving. He teaches us when we don’t know what to do. He is the blessed promise The Father sent to us after Jesus left this earth. Through His grace we can choose the right responses—even when feelings and emotions lag behind. An unchecked attitude can sabotage good intentions, but a surrendered attitude invites God into the moment.

Colossians 3:23 — “Whatever you do, do it heartily, as unto the Lord.”